Frustatingly challenging!!

Yesterday, my 10 yr old's favourite possession..his I-pod got disabled because his younger sister repeatedly typed the wrong pass code. After the initial exchange of words was over ( b/w the 3 of us!! ), I got down to serious thinking. I decieded to take this as an opportunity to familiarise myself with with how these things works and basically get myself more technology abled:). So we started off with thinking who we could approach for help...Maaz suggested his older cousin who is well versed in all this stuff. But that did not work...so next choice..."call the Apple store"...Maaz suggested. We did that, got some technical support on the phone, did all that was told...still didn't work. Called up the store again today, found out there was some setting isssue due to which the process was unsuccessful. So again changed the settings and then redid the whole process...still didn't work. In all this, Maaz was by my side, observing what I was doing, suggesting what I should do. In the process, we learnt a couple of other stuff related to settings, how to tackle storage space issues etc etc. We did all this whole of yesterday evening and today morning. Uptill now I was challenged....now I am beginning to get frustrated. Dunno what I'll do next......

Learning from a dolphin show

A few days ago, I had the opportunity to witness a dolphin show. For obvious reasons :)....this time i was more excited than usual. My observations led to the following thoughts: 1. True, the dolphins were doing the tricks( read as 'expected behaviour') as desired by the trainers. But after each trick, they were constantly being reinforced with fish, hugs, cheers, claps etc. This i felt was nothing but bribes...simply because it came right after an expected behaviour. Sure, a more satisfactory term maybe 'reward'....but we all know why that reward was given, don't we? So does this mean that, to sustain an expected behaviour, bribes are essential? What if the bribe is not given at the end? Will the dolphins stop performing? Also the dolphins were expecting the bribe....they went straight to the trainer after each trick!! 2. In contrast to the above, when i give fish just like that, what is it that I am trying to do/say to the recepient? The fairly obvious answer to this is that " I care / value you for who you are and not what you do". This thought according to me is in itself an energising feeling....don't we all really crave for that? But having said that, lets be reassured that ultimately how one feels is not in my hands at all. I may give 'fish just like that' end number of times, yet the person recieving it may not feel anything...much less feel valued! 3. The onus then falls back on me. When I give 'fish just like that'... I need to ensure that its not being given with any agenda in mind. Also, it is equally if not more important that whatever I do or say, has to be genuine...something that I really feel like doing or something that I really want to do...without any agenda in mind...not even to make that person feel valued. I am doing/saying/giving it just because I feel like doing/saying/giving it. Absolutely, no expectations whatsoever!! :) 4. One may question... is this really possible? I have been over the past few weeks, experimenting with this. The other day, in flight, I just pulled my 10 year old son close, hugged him and planted a kiss on his head. He was...taken aback...to say the least. But he didn't say any thing, simply smiled and I smiled back. That's it!!